The system

Who created "the system?" Know what I mean? 

There's this trap you fall into in the workplace. You can't help it. There are those that "cheat the system." And for whatever reason, how or why is beyond me, but they can get away with it. And little by little the system becomes so out of sorts you don't know how it happened. That's the trap you fall into. And more often than not, it's those that created "the system" are in authoritative roles; managers, charge nurses, upper management, so on. 

Then there are those who aren't in "the system" necessarily, but they can extend their hand to anyone else and anyone else just does whatever they ask. And again, for whatever reason, it's really difficult to say no to that person. Yet in many others eyes, they're not really being much of a team player; just delegating everything, and I do mean....everything, to everyone else. Then I see lots of scrambling at the end of the shift to get things finished for the next shift. (And I will say this; this isn't just happening currently. EVERYWHERE I have worked I have seen these patterns of behavior that are just accepted)

And then there's me. Here's where I fit into this. As a fairly newly appointed charge nurse, I'm trying to fight "the system." It's not been an easy feat, that is for sure. I'm finding out that I'm going to have to earn my respect to exercise my authority, even when it's my absolute authority to exert it. Yet some of the times I'm met with resistance or ultimatums, almost a "what's in it for me" sort of mentality. Mind you, you better believe I'm out helping with other things. I'm not sitting off to the side calling the shots from a distance (or at least I hope I'm not coming across that way). And instead of telling, I ask. I get feedback from others. I have the nurses prepare first before I hand them the admission. I do my darndest to get the referral people off my back (again, not an easy feat). I handle constant complaining that I have zero control over (even when I'm not in charge). And yes, I have tried (and tried, and tried) to squash the negative behaviors I've seen and have been on the receiving end of. I really do try to get everyone involved as much as possible, but I'm not going to be a pushover and I expect everyone to pull their weight when they're under me. I don't want to say "under me" because that seems a bit harsh and abrupt, but it's true. When I'm in charge, we work together. Period. 

But it seems like people in the workplace are just...bolder, I guess is the word I'm going to use. When someone asks me to do something, I do it, unless I'm busy. Even if I'm busy, I say I'll do it when I can. I don't make comments like "oh you're not doing anything" or "you're just dumping on me" or "I'll help only if you do xyz." Nothing. I just do it. The end. The inconsistency baffles me, really. Why is completely ok for others to be disrespectful to me but aren't to anyone else? And yes, I have told my manger, I'm used to this. I am. I was bullied in elementary school and high school. I do have a difficult time asserting myself. I had a friend in high school when I was section leader in marching band tell me "Kelly, the reason nobody listens to you is that you're not mean. You have to be mean." Hmmm....yeah. Never really understood that logic. Oh, and no thanks, by the way. 

The point is, nobody is perfect. I'm not perfect, and I'm not claiming to be. But I just try to do right by everyone and the age old "treat others the way you want to be treated." Maybe one day I'll get the respect that I (hope) I reciprocate to everyone I work with. But I'm not going to change who I am and fall victim of "the system." If that's what I have to do to get on the other side of the cool fence, then no thank you. I'll keep fighting the system if I have to.