The inner ugliness of an unkind soul
Last Monday was the longest 4 hours ever. Funny how negative and just downright ugly attitudes seem to make time go by a lot slower. After getting cussed at, screamed at, belittled and just about everything in between, needless to say we were all ready to run out the door by the time the clock struck 3:30. And in my opinion, it wasn't mental illness we were dealing with; just a downright mean person. It's unfortunate. After venting to the oncoming shift for a little while, I clocked out, laughed manically in the hallway for a bit, then walked to my car and sat for a moment before driving away. And I realized something that I had never realized before.
That kind of behavior; cussing at people, yelling, that sort of thing, they are taught; this I know to be 100% true. But what I realized is that again, something I for sure, that underneath all of that rage and anger is something else. Hurt. A desire to be heard. A desire to just be understood. Or to be loved. And then, I prayed. I prayed because I didn't know what else to do. Down deep, I felt a small amount of...pity I guess is the appropriate word. Pity because carrying around that much ugliness is exhausting. I know. I've been there. Granted it was only for a short amount of time, but still. I didn't like the person I was when I was that way. Chances are though, those I've encountered at work who are hostile and aggressive don't really love themselves either. Anyway, but I wondered. When was the last time someone told this person they loved them? When was the last time someone called or texted them, just because they were thinking about them and hoped they were ok? When was the last time someone reached out to them, just to talk or to listen? Where I work, I can only imagine and wonder. Even in someone who is completely delusional or psychotic, everyone has a basic desire to be loved and appreciated. Let's just say Monday has made me a little more aware of who is around me.
I hope that this raises some awareness for all of you too. Whether it be just being more cognizant of your audience on social media, and perhaps not sharing that opinion piece of insert political party of your choosing. Or whether it be reaching out to a friend or a neighbor who is going through a difficult time. What harm are we doing by being more kind and loving to those around us? Especially to those who are being unkind to us or have been in the past. They need it the most. Life is short, folks. There is way too much negativity going on in the world around you and me. We have a responsibility to just...love. Plain and simple.
That kind of behavior; cussing at people, yelling, that sort of thing, they are taught; this I know to be 100% true. But what I realized is that again, something I for sure, that underneath all of that rage and anger is something else. Hurt. A desire to be heard. A desire to just be understood. Or to be loved. And then, I prayed. I prayed because I didn't know what else to do. Down deep, I felt a small amount of...pity I guess is the appropriate word. Pity because carrying around that much ugliness is exhausting. I know. I've been there. Granted it was only for a short amount of time, but still. I didn't like the person I was when I was that way. Chances are though, those I've encountered at work who are hostile and aggressive don't really love themselves either. Anyway, but I wondered. When was the last time someone told this person they loved them? When was the last time someone called or texted them, just because they were thinking about them and hoped they were ok? When was the last time someone reached out to them, just to talk or to listen? Where I work, I can only imagine and wonder. Even in someone who is completely delusional or psychotic, everyone has a basic desire to be loved and appreciated. Let's just say Monday has made me a little more aware of who is around me.
I hope that this raises some awareness for all of you too. Whether it be just being more cognizant of your audience on social media, and perhaps not sharing that opinion piece of insert political party of your choosing. Or whether it be reaching out to a friend or a neighbor who is going through a difficult time. What harm are we doing by being more kind and loving to those around us? Especially to those who are being unkind to us or have been in the past. They need it the most. Life is short, folks. There is way too much negativity going on in the world around you and me. We have a responsibility to just...love. Plain and simple.
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